Christmas #3

Christmas #1. (The greyhound experiences)

It was a cold and gray Christmas Eve Day in Hood River Oregon when Isaiah accidentally drove our 1987 Honda Accord into a lovely car in front of us, thus demolishing our one and only car.  We were three hours from home in a small town where there was only one police officer who failed to show up at the scene of the incident, and we did not have any friends or family that we knew of in the vicinity.  We stood on the curb shivering and freezing for hours until We discovered we did know someone in Hood River and we had a lovely Christmas Eve diner with them. (It was EXTREMELY random.)

Several hours later we were on a greyhound bus traveling back to Eugene, car-less, and destitute.  We spent our Christmas Day driving around in circles looking for anything that might be open so that we could eat.  Our hearts were empty and so was our refrigerator and our tummies. We finally ended up at the only place that was open on Christmas in Eugene:  The All-You-Can Eat Chinese  Buffet.  Yum!

Christmas #2 (The Talking Parrot)

We were “house sitting” for an older couple which happened to own a doberman pincher, two cats and a talking parrot which would tell me on occasion to “go to hell” as I reluctantly gave him his breakfast. That Christmas, we spent much of our Christmas eve in front of their fireplace amidst the aroma of dog and cat and foul-mouth bird, as the dog jumped on us and licked us profusely, shortly after having his evening drink out of the toilet.

And, we went to the Sizzler.  Yes, that restaurant where all that mouth-watering- all you can eat shrimp and pasta and ice cream with scoops of gummy bears and everything you could ever want when you were seven years old.  I had been talking about reliving this childhood experience ever since Isaiah and I started watching “King of the Hill” together and the Sizzler commercial came on every commercial break and I reminded him each time of how I long to go there once again.  That Christmas I learned that some things are better left as Childhood memories.

Christmas #3…….To come shortly!

Back by Popular Demand

I am back by popular demand.  What I mean by that is, one person stated that they miss my little blogs, so I guess that means I am popular, and in demand.  So I am going to excite everyone with a question:

What on earth can make one person cold enough that they can’t even lift the covers off them to feed a screaming baby, and the next person is so hot they are sweating a lake of sweat in your bed and refuse to turn the heater on? Furthermore, what do you do? You know you are right, seeing that the world in Eugene Oregon has become a frozen tundra, but you can’t deny the pool of sweat on your spouses side of the bed.

Don’t do what I do and yell a lot, its not good for the marriage.  But don’t do what Isaiah does and whine, which is not a wise course of action to take to the tired wife. Perhaps  a more simple solution is to send the baby to boarding school until he is able sleep through the night.

Well I gotta go.  Baby James is looking mighty desperate over there.

Conversations.

Isaiah:  “Little Baby Jed, who do you love more, your Mama or your Papa?

Baby Jed:  Silence.

JoAnna: “See, he loves me more, I am his life support, and I carried him in my womb for 9 months.”

Isaiah:  “But I am so much fun”

Baby Jed

Jedidiah James

Abu Jedidiah

Gangster Jedidiah

He takes after Mamma. Nothing fits or matches.

Here he is.

 

Little Jedidiah Taylor James.  Born on November 6, 2009, weighing 7 lbs 14 oz.  Mommy is recovering from C-Section, so Daddy and Mommy will post more about little Baby James soon.  We love him a whole bunch!

In Love

leggy Chicken Leg soup. mmmm….

How to make chicken broth from leggy chicken leg feet:

Directions:

1.  Have your man go away for a few days out of town, and become very anxious about the arrival of your newborn infant baby James.

2.  Read up on traditional foods and realize that many (Chinese people and also grandmothers all over the world!) have been using chicken feet to create the most rich, nourishing and thick broth possible.

3.  Make a rash decision at the meat market and bring home a bag of chicken feet  without first looking at them.

4.  Open the bag and run to the other side of the room.   Knowing that there are creepy claw-like dead looking people resembling hands sitting in a bag waiting to be thrown into a pot of boiling water sitting in your house might be enough to give you a nightmarish chilly feeling that won’t go away.

5.  Call your husband.  Tell him that you made a mistake and you might want to cry.

6.  Have him tell you that if you don’t cook the chicken feet, he will be very angry.

7.  Brave it up:  Look for a recipe online.

8.  Gather courage, is it really that hard to throw chicken feet into a pot of boiling water?  I think not.

9.  Re-think number 8.

10.  Gain courage again and follow first directions in recipe.  “Place Chicken feet in four quarts of boiling water.”

11.  Be glad you didn’t read the next step for the recipe before you accomplished the first, which is as follows:  Remove after ten minutes from the boiling water, cool completely and then chop off the finger tips.”  DO WHAT?

12.  Wait with dread for the next ten minutes.  Avert your eyes from the scene of the disaster, until you just get too curious.  Look over your shoulder and find that there are claws bouncing up and down in boiling water that can be seen as I peer just over our toaster oven, that might hop right out of the pot and start walking toward you.

13.  Shudder.

14.  10 minutes later:  Pray really hard.  Maybe they will go away.  Nope they just didn’t!

15.  Throw the water-logged looking dinosaur-human hands that resemble a persons hands who may have drowned by and floating in water for several days into your colander and smile.  Okay, you made it through!  you did it!

16.  Read the next direction which happens to be a warning:  Do not use kitchen scissors to cut off the tips of the fingers, or they will go flying all over the place.

17.  Okay, where are all my Chinese friends?  Where is there a grandmother?  I scour my thoughts and think of no one who can come rescue me.  Oh no.

18.  Hide again.

19.  Call husband again.  No comfort there.

20.  Become brave and chop all those little fingers off.  If you don’t just force yourself, you will not be able to do it.  Yay you did it!

21.  Throw the chicken feet back into the water and let simmer for four hours.

22.  Come back four hours later and find drain the chicken feet.

23.  Throw them in the trash violently then wrap the trash bag up and throw it in the trash can immediately to avoid any sort of uncomfortable mental health risks.

23.  Put broth in the fridge.

25.  Pull out when chilled.  You now have about the tastiest broth you can ever imagine.  And you will be very well pleased, and be cured of any sickness or disease, that is, if you believe in the traditional methods of the old ladies and the wise Chinese women of ages present and past.

Random Questions.

I am not quite sure why I am filling this out when I have a multitude of other things to do, but I found the “Quiz” somewhat amusing and decided to fill it out here on my blog, which will be uploaded to facebook. I do not have the patients to figure out exactly how to “Copy and Paste” onto my “notes.” So here goes nothing:

1.What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
Toothpaste

2.Where was your profile picture taken?
On a couch that smelled like a dog.

3.Can you play Guitar Hero?
What is Guitar Hero?

4.Name someone who made you laugh today?
Barak Obama

5.How late did you stay up last night and why?
11:30 because that’s what time I went to bed.

6.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
If I could, I might move to the kitchen from the living room.

7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
Oh boy, yes. Hee hee hee.

8. Which of your friends lives closest to you?
My Husband.

9. Do you believe ex’s can be friends?
Best, best friends.

10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper?
Full of High Fructose Corn Syrup which is a related factor of obesity, diabetes and a number of common modern day problems, all the more reason to like it an indulge in it every now and again.

11. When was the last time you cried really hard?
This morning.

12. Who took your profile picture?
Isaiah

13. Who was the last person you took a picture of?
Laura and Chris Potter

14. Was yesterday better than today?
Depends on who you are asking.

15. Can you live a day without TV?
Yes. I can live many days without T.V. But not more than 15.

16. Are you upset about anything?
Yes. But the weather is making up for it.

17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Depends on what kind of relationship it is. If its a crappy one than probably not.

18. Are you a bad influence?
Depends on who I am influencing.

19. Night out or night in?
Actually, I like walking into bars pregnant. It makes me laugh when people look at me funny.

20. What items could you not go without during the day?
Food, air and clothing.

21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
Isaiah James. I visit him regularly in the hospital. It’s a lot of fun.

22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
Yes, I am at home where I usually am.

23. How do you feel about your life right now?
Kind of strange and expectant.

24. Do you hate anyone?
Yes, I hate a man at the airport who antagonized me.

25. If we were to look in your facebook inbox, what would we find?
Secret Government Conspiracies.

26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
I don’t feel as though I will but I probably would.

27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
No not really

28. What song is stuck in your head?
I don’t have one, thank goodness.

29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m. -Who do you want it to be?
Santa Clause with a bunch of presents.

30.Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50?
No, not really.

31. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
Face the world.

32. Do you think too much or too little?
I think enough to get me by.

33. Do you smile a lot?
When I was in the eight grade I did.

Leggy Legs

Last night I awoke screeching because I could not move my legs. They were in some sort of contorted spasm that was causing a lot of pain. I woke Isaiah up by accident, which I hate doing to him because he gets real tired because he works real hard. But I was yelling out of agony, and it was inevitable that he would be woken from a deep sleep. We quickly massaged my calves and which helped much and I fell back asleep. When I woke up my legs were still sore and painful, and I was having trouble walking.

I got up to check up ‘Leg Cramps during pregnancy” online and apparently it can be a symptom during late pregnancy. I read to go on a brisk walk, not to cross your legs and to eat two bananas a day. As much as I don’t often believe in Natural remedies I am going to try to do each of these things today, although I am very disappointed in the weather because it has reached a high of 75 degrees, which I am not interested in. I feel hotter and sticker than I am sure I should be feeling at this temperature. I am sure my next note will be of a bit more joyful nature.

A little too soon? hmmm….

Apparently, our president has won the noble peace prize.  Perhaps I am out of the loop and I do not understand what a Noble peace prize is, but I was under the assumption that it was an honor that people got AFTER they had done something great for the world.

ALI AKABR JAVANFEKR, AIDE TO IRANIAN PRESIDENT MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD:

“We hope that this gives him the incentive to walk in the path of bringing justice to the world order. We are not upset and we hope that by receiving this prize he will start taking practical steps to remove injustice in the world.”

Do they really give people an award to give them incentive to do good?  I hope someone gives me an award this morning for being on top of my tasks and not getting distracted from the things I need to get done, and I hope that award is a hot croissant with melted ham and cheese at a pastry shop.